Bullshit Things I Learned In Grade School

  1. No pain no gain. When your running and you get a cramp or you get uncomfortable, just run past it. Consequence: a popped lung because pain isn't a good thing.

  2. Cable TV is required in order to keep up to date with things. Cable TV doesn't provide any extra local news channels above peasant vision.

  3. Save all of your receipts. Honestly who the fuck is going to keep every receipt for every coffee they purchase in the mornings.

  4. There is a proper way to pick up babies, that will insure that you do not break their arms, legs or neck. Babies are capable of handling the abuse from a whole range of bad parents. I doubt very much that people have to take a course on how to pick up a small child. Teaching people this does nothing but add unnecessary fear.

  5. Math isn't required throughout your life. Most all of it will be forgotten, so just put up with it now and get through it. Math is used throughout university and many college courses, which is a big part of your life. Not to mention that it will probably be used in your job if you care enough to get a job that requires education.